I’m Still Here! Need to post most every day!

Stephen Sondheim is still freaking alive! Anyone who knows Sondheim will get my title right away for you other heathens – it’s a reference from Follies a musical about aging Vaudeville performers trying to stay relevant in the latter half of the 20th Century.

Are my theatre roots showing?? What kind of dye do I need to cover those??? He hehehehe!

I have some gaming news. I would like to have a section devoted to gamers like me, what I call “Lamer Gamers”. Those of us, young or old, who just don’t play video games very well but still like to play them. Most “pro” gamers are twitch crazy youngsters who only like to compete so they want games to be super hard. We Lamer Gamers like to explore without dying every five to 25 seconds because the mechanics to win means we have to press 20 million buttons or triggers within a span of a micro second in order to defeat an enemy or jump across a casm without falling to our gory deaths. Of course there are those who can’t walk and chew gum at the same time who can drive an automatic shift vehicle unless they are trying to walk, chew gum, text yelp, listen to overly loud music, be sarcastic with their imaninary significan “other” or scream at another driver who just cut them off because they were too slow due to the above concurrent activities.

Lamer Gamers like some “walking simulators” but hey, we’re action junkies too! I play most all AAA titles on EASY mode though I’ve done some Half-Life mods on “normal” and “hard” with a little difficulty but mods are game-play-bait, if you make them too hard, no one will want to play your mods, too easy and no one will want to play them either. There is a “sweet spot” for mods (by mods I mean G Mods {Gary’s Mods} or Russian Rip Offs of Half-life or it’s game engine) and modders usually target tje best Lamer Gamers, which is not saying much but hey, you gotta start somewhere AND Fan boys (still a sexist term but it’s iconic now so whatya gonna do??) The twitch-aholic super competitors won’t waste the time unless the modders have put in super-sweet-ass weapons, insane maps and promises of ironically off-brand product endorsements. They are not even interested in boobs unless the boobs fire RPG rounds or lasers.

Being a senior gay man – a Sextagenarian Polar Bear (60+, overweight, hairy, oldster with mostly white hair and full beard) I’m pretty much left out of the prime gamer demographic i.e. 8 – 32 Year Old BOYS (most all females are left out as well and not just bitchy SJWs who can only cry crocodile tears and whine about the “…unfairness of it all!!” Still haven’t seen HER indigame entries let alone AAA titles. Make the damn games you want to see made and stop slapping the hands of all those post pubescent to way past post adolescent boys, they have more than just a D-pad to wangle with that hand!) There have been some games made for the gay male crowd i.e. Strange Flesh and Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator (there are a couple others but they are elusive in tracking down or Steam just dumps them after awhile).

Strange Flesh is an indi title along the lines of 16 bit bare hand fight simulators like those of the classic Capcom arcade era but with butch, presumably gay, punk, BDSM and average Joe gay bar types. You play a hunky street wise bar tender out to enlighten average Joes in the ways of man-to-man sex through cigar smoke filled kisses and beating any man, dog or other “thing” who tries to get in your way. It is mostly sarcastic “butch” camp but most Bears will find it funny, especially when our hero kicks “twinks” to the curb and brings average Joes to orgasm. It’s all in dirty good fun.

Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator was, at least I thought it was going to be, an okay game but the “Daddy” part ruined it. Most of us gay dudes are NOT going to settle down and have children, it’s nice that some do or would like to but it’s not my dream. MY dream DADDY is childless by choice and into ME as his TOP pappa BEAR. I usually don’t like guys younger than forty and I have MANY KINKS as in BDSM – mostly SM and I like talking to persons of all genders and likes who are intelligent and articulate. Most twinks are dumbasses and most of the guys who like them are equally dumbasses. That’s why I’m a BEAR with a BEARD. I wear what I like. I like black leather so I wear it! I like black harness boots so I wear them! I like harnesses and leather suspenders and leather hats etc. SO I WEAR THEM! Then, of course I like other colors so I wear those as well! Whew! all those exclamation points – they wear a guy out. Thought I was going to use another exlamation point, didn’t ya? Tee Hee/Snicker. I got bored with Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator after about 45 minutes. I still have it in my Steam Library but I really don’t feel like revisiting it any time in the next decade. The art work in it is pretty good but the game play is like the worst point and click “adventure” computer game (think Leisure Suit Larry) crossed with an almost adult version of the classic 60’s board game for girls, Mystery Date! (There IS an exclamation point on the box of this drekky awful board game so don’t blame ME!) Ahem, there are Daddy/Dad’s that have geeky careers and those with, well, creepy careers. Look it up if you don’t believe me.


The title of my blog does have that little end tag of “…And Too Much Tech.” so I’d like to address that part. I have descriptions of each of my current computer devices (I guess I should include my phone but I’m NOT a big smart phone fan, though I do prefer NON-iphones over apple”s over-priced CRAP, and I do use a smart phone, though after my last Samsung Galaxy III (I don’t update every freaking year as I’m on a very fixed income), I decided to go with a very reasonably priced Moto G-6 (under 300 bucks and it packs a lot of good stuff almost comparable with either a high end Samsung or Asshole -er- Apple’s Shite phone line.) I build my own desktops, buy Dell laptops (that’s about to end – Dell, the Owner/CFO himself – not the company – has been pissing me off as of late), Samsung Tablets (less expensive and just as good as Apple’s Shite tablet line) which I use mainly for YouTube, email but NOT porn (and because I HATE texting or typing on a screen keyboard and I had bad experiences with blu-tooth separate keybords) and goofy netbooks from some French manufacturer called Thomson(????) it’s along the line of smaller Chromebook types but this one has Windows 10 – Home – yeah, I know I thought it was stupid too but the ones with the Android like operating systems where tens to hundreds of dollars more. It runs Windbloze on an ARM processor (look it up, I’m too tired to spell it out for you) and it’s not stonkingly fast but it’s serviceable – I’m wanting to use it for cafe blogging/email/some in bed porn viewing – I’m getting bored and annoyed with having to worry about my gamer chair getting skid marks on it while viewing Bear/Hot Daddy porn with my undies and shorts down around my ankles and that damned Dell 17″ Laptop with great graphics and a Ryzen 3 CPU running at 3.5 GhZ is too freaking heavy to lay on my ample belly while trying to fap and I’m afraid of getting lube all over the keyboard and touch pad… so I use my cute little Thomson which barely weighs two pounds and it’s okay graphics are good enough…? I’m hoping to erase Windbloze 10, after the warrenty expires, and replace it with Linux.

Here are some pictures – ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Enough Tech???? Ooops! I forgot my humongo Dell Laptop. Another time I guess. “Look Ma! No skidmarks!!”



It’s That Time of the Month er Millennium and Yes I know HOW to vote but I CAN’T along with a whole lot of other people


Well this will be the first mid-term election I will have to miss. I know it’s our civic duty but when certain laws are in place to prevent you for voting for not so various reasons and only in some states then you can’t so please don’t guilt us for not voting as we are already being punished for it – literally.

That having been said I will be able to vote in 2020 and I will posit a position that we END voter suppression for non-incarcerated and/or non-violent offenders. With the population as it is today this should be a no-brainer. Unfair laws should be voted on by the people who are/were harmed by them. Those on probation/parole have essentially fulfilled their sentences and if you want to extend suppression of voting rights for repeat VIOLENT offenders then I could see that as well. Laws can be changed and hopefully for the better of EVERYONE. The other thing that needs to be changed is the gross stigma tied to POOR offenders. White collar criminals need to be punished more justly and not allowed to “buy” their way out of it.

All drugs need to be decriminalized – not legalized, except for marijuana. You can still restrict certain activities like dispensing/receiving without a legitimate prescription by a legitimate seller/pharmacist, driving and/or operating heavy machinery while under the influence and employers can still suspend or fire drugged or drunk employees/executives while on the job or at the workplace.  What’s kind of humorous about this is that liquor establishments were shut down on voting day so that people wouldn’t vote drunk. I think GREED is a far more insidious disease that warrants extreme stigma against it!

Still not really satisfied…

“Thought I’d something more to say…”

Not quite sure how to do much of anything on here still. I see Gaysians is now following me, can’t figure out why but hope I can come up with some fun stuff.

They still haven’t told me what I get for paying $180 dollars a year and if I don’t get any REAL help soon I will probably scrap this idiot thing and definitely not renew next year.

I tried following some dork on YouTube who only made it worse. I should have just kept to the free plan. As you can see this is what is currently making me hangrier than usual.

The political shit show that is that orange, ass-hat-buffoon that thinks it’s a president and his maga-maggots, does make me as a gay man more nervous than ever.  And now fucking Grammarly is fucking up. I’m done with it. I just want a simple spell checker and these ass hats don’t have one either.

Now On to Some juicier Stuff

I had some other posts that got lost in draft land that dealt with movies, philosophy, belief… but they are gone. Now that I’m officially PAYING  for this privilege I hope to do more and to GET more support.

One of my big bugaboos is my change of religious thought. I was a funny mentalist Christianist  but am now a born again pagan with Sufi/Human/Agnostic leanings. I have a wonderfully complicated spiritual background since my “graduation” from a spiritual school some 15 years ago. For me to get more into that background I would have to say that I came to find that as a species with a bent towards spiritual matters we are more a worshiper of tools than of deities. Our bodies are tools, our belief systems are tools, our most passionate hobbies are tools. Tools – those things or ideas that assist us with staying alive both physically as well as psychologically/spiritually – what we live for. We know that we are not the only tool using species on this planet but we tend to make our tools more special than most other species make theirs. Religion is just a tool – nothing more and nothing less. We often call these kind of tools mechanisms i.e. coping mechanisms, healing mechanisms, social mechanisms etc.

Some forms of religions teach us to rely heavily on some of those mechanisms and some teach to use them only when needed and then let them go until they are needed again – these latter religions also warn us about getting habituated and or addicted to those same mechanisms. Christianity is of the former school of “though” and you could say that Buddhism/Taoism are of the latter. An interesting note is that you can get addicted to all these forms and not realize it.

Bring Back Night Court!

Bring back Night Court! A crazy, silly TV show from the 1990s, how I miss it!!!! It started the more intelligent, magical-realism/fantasy absurdly humorous genre which includes other shows such as Scrubs, Brooklyn 911, 30 Rock, Barney Miller, 3rd Rock and was a welcome departure from the grossly cliche 70s/80s dreck that proceeded it i.e. Different Strokes, The Facts of Life, Good Times, The Jefferson’s (these were more along the lines of “magical Melerdramer”)etc. There were some ground breaking shows like All in the Family & Maude, mainly by Norman Lear (though the spin offs cited above were of lesser caliber) and Mary Tyler Moore in the mid to late 70s/early 80s.

Night Court had much better writers, directors, producers, characters and actors/comedians than the previous sitcoms (most of the Lear ones excepted) AND it strove to unburden itself from the trite formula and overly used canned laugh-track. Don’t get me wrong, Night Court also borrowed heavily from the past decades sitcoms but more in a way so as to parody or out-right mock the past and maybe even fondly memorialize it in a strange way.



Maybe this isn’t such a good idea…

I guess I should spend a little more time posting here but I like “ranting” in the comments sections of my favorite YouTube channels. I get little to no response there and have found out that if I say really nice things that I them get ignored. I used to get more response from negative things but even that has slacked off.

I also would like for this blog to express my other “interests” in “life” and what the hell is up with all these “quotation marks”???? Ah-hem such as my spirituality and take on religion and atheism my major “position” being that I’m NOT religious and AM spiritually inclined and I’m not an atheist but do have more in kind with “them” than with traditional theists. Do atheist exist??? Well of course the fuck they do!! They hold up in their little atheist houses, and drive their little, hybrid atheist cars and eat their little atheist food while petting their little atheist dogs and cats and go to their little atheist concerts while waving their little atheist banners and then go blog or vlog on their little atheist laptops and attend their little atheist jobs… Yes this is a BIG elaborate joke on how most Anti atheists characterize atheists and make stupid statements like,”Atheism is just another religion!!” or “There is no such thing as an atheist!!!” Boy they sure like to use those exclamation points a lot don’t they? Well this is one of my interests. More to follow soon…